Preparing to Try Something New
Photo credit: Jennifer Lewi
As I keynote more and more conferences, one question that people often ask is, “Do I get nervous speaking?” Not so much nowadays, but this was not always the case. Ten years ago, I had a real case of nerves before even the smallest speaking opportunity. These nervous feelings would destroy my sleep the night before. As I got closer to the presentation, my stomach would start doing uncomfortable flips, and sometimes even my knees would feel weak😬. Bleck! I really disliked every one of these public speaking side effects. Talking to long-time speakers, I learned that the feelings often go away with practice, so I joined a local Toastmasters club. Well, I threw myself into my local Toastmasters club, and in the first year, I performed over 50 speeches in the club and around my local area.
Those experienced speakers were right! After a few speeches, the weak knee feeling went away. Then the butterflies went away, and one morning, I noticed that I actually slept through the night before. Fifty wasn’t a magic number, but the repetition sure did the trick. By doing it over and over and over, I finally convinced my amygdala that taking the stage wasn’t going to kill me.
I’ve given more than 374 presentations in the last ten years. 50 in that first year, another 200-ish (or more) for association audiences in the early years of my business, and then when I got my first paid opportunity, I started officially counting—124 as of today.
What kicks my nerves into action these days? Something new. A new technology I want to try. A new participatory element or activity I’m trying out. A new story I’m sharing for the first time. Every time I try or test something new, I get a tiny jolt that I suppose is my brain saying, “Watch out! We don’t know if this new experiment will work, and if it doesn’t, we will feel shame, which is bad.”
When this happens, I now know it is just temporary, but if that doesn’t help, I’ve got a shortcut that can do the trick. I reframe.
In the early years of my business, I remember a popular keynoter talking about his nerves (and I wish I could give him credit, but I suppose he has retired because I don’t see his content out there anymore. Unfortunately, I forget his name, but I remember his idea.) He said when he started to feel the butterflies, he would think, “This is my body’s way of preparing for optimal performance!” Whenever I’m about to take the leap and feel those feelings, I remember his words, and they help.
You might feel your nerves get excited, too, whenever you take a leap. The leap from giving an orientation webinar to hosting an interactive virtual onboarding event. The leap from one technology platform to another. Or anytime you shake up a tried and true recipe.
If you are like me (and I suspect you are), you will do this new thing a few times, and it will cease to be scary, and soon you’ll be looking for the next leap!
